First off, I woke up this morning, and suddenly found that I was bi...
But I wish I was bi...
Anyway, yes, for those of you who haven't heard, I'm back in the Bay for a few months, doing a play at the Magic Theatre in SF. I'll be flying around on a trapeze (provided I don't tear my shoulder out of its socket... again... knock wood, please), and if you're going to be in the area from Sept. 8th thru Oct. 7th, you should definitely come peep it. Here's a link:
In other news, I just bought this new pomade that turns out to be so incredibly sticky that if I female should try ot run her hand through my hair, it might just stick there forever. In other words, I finally found the product I've been looking for, and I may now be able to sustain a relationship for more than a couple nights, if only by virtue of capture.
I was stung by a bee on Monday, right on my pinky finger. I went a good, solid decade without getting stung by anything, and now, bam, twice in a month. Is this God trying to tell me to stop stealing honey from supermarkets? Ha! You'll have to do better than that, God.
So, the Bay Area is this place that I tend to mythologize. When I'm away for long periods of time, I tell stories of my homeland like it was Eden. I'll go on and on about the people, the produce, and the burritos to the point where, after a while, even I feel like "surely this guy is exaggerating". But, you know what? Every time I come back, I realize that I haven't been exaggerating at all. The people really really are way cool. The place is totally breath-takingly beautiful. The produce really is fresher, juicier, doper. And, if the burritos were anatomically correct... well, I'd be making chimichangas.
My first big purchase when I got here: a surfboard. Actually, that's not true. I bought a car. It turns out it's waaaaaay cheaper to buy an old beater then sell it back after you're done using it than it is to rent a car for three months. But, after that, I bought a surfboard. Took it out on Monday, and I LOVE it, and I LOVE surfing in California. Who's coming with me? I'm not even joking.
The only other big purchase I have planned is this: after ten years of playing, I have finally decided to buy myself a new guitar. I'm very excited about it.
Also, my tattoo will be turning 10 next month.
I will leave you with this thought: Deltron 3030 is one of the greatest albums ever, and if you don't know, then you need to work on that shit.